Walking Dead Dream

I had the most horrifying nightmare last night where I shifted into multiple characters, all who had a pretty terrible time in the Walking Dead world.  I went to bed thinking my life was shitty, but woke up with a terrified shock from what I just lived through.  It felt so incredibly real.

I think it began as continuing off where an episode last left off, like it was starting a new season. The situation was that what was left of Rick’s crew, maybe around 12-15 people, had been living on a farm, they were all intense and on guard with guns.  A lot of wind was picking up, so naturally, many of us looked up- there was a large military looking vehicle looming over us, and I was playing on a swing- for a second, the thought that we were finally going to be saved flitted across my mind.  I started hearing gunfire ring out, and realized that one by one, the people across the field were going down like dominos.  They were being picked off.  From the air.  Some of us were looking elsewhere though, distracted- and I realized a horde of the walking dead were headed towards us.  It was a massacre, where men and women alike ran towards the shed to retrieve more guns, fending off the zombies while each continued to fall down; the zombies were being hit from all sides alike.  One lone woman, Sasha, ran towards the fence, but like everyone else, she too, fell over and didn’t get back up.  My mind furiously debated over making it over to the other shed, where my dog was kept, to shoot her before she got eaten alive, but then- blank.  All was dark.  And yet, I was still thinking, has the scene ended, or did I get killed, or both?

Then, it was like a rewind, and I paid attention this time to one of the members of our party.  She was an attractive, young, bi-racial woman.  Towards the back of the house, she comes face-to-face with the military leader, a perhaps 40s, arrogant looking white dude with a cropped hairstyle.  He charms her, they walk into the house, and enter a dark tv room to discuss matters.  She has that permanent frown on her face, but they seem to come to an agreement.  He assures her that it’s better not to alarm the others that the military force is here, and that they won’t come under any harm.  Because this is the Walking Dead, it is implied they hook up.  Cut to next scene, she runs out the house, appalled at what she is seeing as her friends get shot down all around her.  As the lone survivor, she realizes all is lost, and in the chaos runs towards the fence.  Because the general is fond of her, he lets her go.

We see the POV of the pilot now, as he flies over the farm and discovers living residents.  As if it were a video game, he zooms in, centers on the face of each terrified individual, and aims right at the face, and they go down.  Later on, he claims he was just following orders from the general, and it was like a repeat of MyLai Massacre.

To be finished another time.


Am I Scared? Yeah.

The other day, I was talking to an evangelist and gave him a very brief update on my life.  I told him about my evaluations coming up and he asked me if I was scared.  HECK YEAH I’M SCARED.  But thinking about it and focusing on it and letting it paralyze me from my goals and living life isn’t the way to live.  So I try not to let it disrupt me too much.

But I had a dream last night, one of those dreams where you wake up in a dream and don’t really realize you’re in one (Inception lol), and I was in a cozy hospital bedroom, and as I moved, I realized I could breathe a lot better than I ever did.  However, as I moved, I realized that there was a deep wound under my right boob, and I realized I had gone under some sort of lung surgery.  Then I was in pain, or however close pain can be replicated in your mind in an alternate reality, and then it was not so fun.

When I actually woke up, I realized that this alternate reality is not so alternate, and then I’d have to prepare for twice the amount of pain as a double lung transplant would mean an incision under both my boobs.  This is fear.

Dreams and Evolutions

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always had vivid dreams and a wild imagination.  I’m not sure if it was because of the side effects of some medication I took, but it was both a blessing and a nightmare.

My dreams have ranged from hanging onto a rope in some never-ending, Alice in Wonderland-esque tunnel, where a ray of light revealed gold specks of dust drifting down gently around me, both an eternal moment of tension as well as peace, to clowns hunting down my parents and I in a mall, and sitting on a toilet in the middle of another mall while dinosaurs ran everywhere.

I used to document every single dream, because I almost always remembered each one from the night before, until an embarrassing moment where I forgot to private a post and someone in the dream read it.  But I’ve decided to start again.

The one I had last night was really wonderful.  I was living in this building with two other people, with classy, warm-auburn brick walls and christmas lights hanging aglow.  It started with a Daredevil feel, where I was trying to escape from a building across the waters to get back to my house, of whose deck or patio was overlooking the waters.  This was my backyard.  As I hung in the cozy light where the interior kitchen was paired with a black, clean feel of the floor, and brick walls, I basked in the light, feeling comforted.  As I walked across and opened two glass doors, I was shocked to discover it doubled into another much larger area with the similar design and feel, but with many tables spread as a restaurant.  The ambiance was perfect.  Later on, when I walked out, I realized the entire building was designed uniquely in an elongated fashion, to fit a thin strip of the border between water and land- the other side had lamp posts, a sidewalk, and then a quaint street.


My friend is really knowledgeable in biology, and even though I was always easily confused when I studied back in high school and even college, I always found it really fascinating.  Now that I have more time, I should go back and just learn more about the world of human evolution, and marine biology.