So I always feel like I’m not doing enough. For myself, for other people. It’s a lot of pressure. I’m consciously making an effort to think of all the things that I AM doing though, and there are a lot of things actually that I’ve worked towards and improved on despite all the other regular shit going on.
- Crisis Textline Volunteer – in the process of being trained. I already agree with a lot of the things I’m being taught in the guidelines and videos, so that’s a good sign. I worry that I won’t be able to handle it emotionally and will feel like a failure. But I still think it’s a good challenge to try. Text HOME to 741741 if you’re looking for support.
- Starting a new job as a Data Entry Specialist this upcoming week- again, feeling like I might be a failure if I can’t hold onto this job or feel sick and end up quitting/getting let go. But that’s another thing I’m working towards for summer plans, and I hope I at least learn something.
- Dating – Yeah, I had an anxiety attack last night thinking that I’ll never find somebody, but I did go on a few dates and it’s probably hit the end of the road in that department for now, but whatever I tried lol yay me.
- Seeing friends – I’ve definitely made a huge effort to stay present and updated in my friends’ lives, and I am pretty content with my social life at the moment, which is a rare thing.
- Body – I’ve hit my weight goals and also hit the gym 9 times the past month, which was my original goal all year long and I wasn’t able to hit that goal until recently. I do see mild tricep/bicep lines, but legs and butt still feel like sticks. Regardless, I’ve also taken up Sunday yoga again and I’m happy I forced myself to do that because it does help more or less. My parents also go on evening walks and my dad goes on a few runs each week, so I’m also proud of them!